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I’m beginning to wonder what the heck kind of skill set I have built for myself.

A friend of mine just called me up to find out if I could teach archery to a bunch of girls at a camp in Bancroft.


In Bancroft.

Don’t get me wrong; I am happy to do it, especially for this friend.  It’s just a strange thing when someone tells you that you are the one that came to mind in a flash at four AM while struggling to answer the question, “Who do I know that owns a bow and some arrows?”

I guess I’ll just put my Archery Badge next to my MMA Black Belt Badge (a belt that, while loosely based on the ITF Taekwon-Do belt system, does not have much precedence anywhere else), and then I’ll pin on my Expert in Laminate Flooring Badge.

My Producer of Mediocre Art Badge resulted in a commission to do a going-away present for my old VP.  Again, someone thought to themselves, “Who can draw a silly picture about this guy and fill it full of nerdy jokes?”  And I was the answer.

Mr Cash was also the tech guy for our school, so the Windows OS jokes made a horrible, nerdy kind of sense. While I am proud of this picture, part of me still cringes at how much of a geek I am to come up with this stuff.

“Hey, who do you think could help us pick out a mat cutter?”

“I bet Nick could help!”

“Ever stripped paint before?”

“Nope.  Neither has Nick, but I bet he’ll know how to do it!”

Again, it isn’t that I don’t want to be asked, but I just wonder where this illusion of highly specific, highly eclectic competency arose. I’m a bumbling idiot with most things.  I wouldn’t say that my life is completely composed of screw-ups, but they are at least the dandelions to my lawn of existence.  I guess that’s why I find it so odd that I end up doing things like archery lessons, or teaching people how to execute 360 degree back piercing kicks, or baking loaves of bread the size of baking trays.

So, while I prepare to teach some kids the archaic art of sticking things with arrows, I’ll just wait for the next phone call to go hunt yetis, or build a log cabin, or make fireworks.

It is nice to be wanted for something.